Note to self: If I ever have to perform military service, I should make a point of putting myself in a situation where my face receives a major (yet fashionable; perhaps a slash across my right eye) scar. That way, if I ever decide to run for President, this succeeds both in making me look like a sexy bad-ass who knows what he's talking about and prevents the other party from even thinking about asking me to pull out my old payroll records. Furthermore, there will be no need to spout rhetoric about the differences between a General and a Lieutenant. Regardless of the title I receive, the scar will speak for itself, and will allow me to focus on other issues besides my military service.
Plus, I did mention it would be sexy and bad-ass, right?
